Our Next Governor

You Can Take His Word For It, Probably.

I’m really at a loss to know what to say about Mark Robinson. He is such the complete MAGA Republican that I’m surprised they don’t carry him around on their shoulders during his campaign stops. (Don’t start with how it would take several big strong guys . . . we don’t go there.) Robinson is a Serious Contender. I fully expect him to be elected Governor by acclaim – HUZZAHs! shouted from all corners of the state, come election day.

What makes him such a powerhouse of a candidate? Simple. He hits every note. He is the Garfunkel to Former-President-What’s-his-name’s Simon. Harmony and melody. Plus, Robinson is just obsequious enough to make the short list of people the Great and Powerful Ooze hasn’t turned on. Yet.

One thing that sets Robinson apart from his role model are the humble beginnings for our Governor-in-waiting. He was the ninth of ten children, raised by an alcoholic father in an abusive home, and spend some formative years in foster care.^[1] (It’s tempting to point out here that Robinson, that other shitshow from Mar-a-Lago, and Hitler all had harsh and distant fathers, but that’s an unfortunately common event. It’s not easy to raise a world-class sociopath, you have to have special skills.)

Robinson was in the Army reserve, and he went to college for a while. He wanted to be a history professor. As you probably know, MAGAs are great fans of history. To them, it’s like a buffet, from which they choose the most delectable and sweetly scented pieces, ignoring (or denying) anything that does not suit their palate. He finally hit his stride when – on the heels of the Parkland shooting – he went before the Greensboro city council and made an impassioned speech in favor of gun rights, referring to the Parkland survivors as "spoiled, angry, know it all CHILDREN"; "spoiled little bastards"; and "media prosti-tots".^[2] That earned him a gig later that year (2018) speaking at the annual convention of the NRA.

From there it was a short run that landed him in the North Carolina Lt. Governor’s seat in 2020. By 2021 he was fully on board with the idea that Biden stole the White House, dismissing the January 6 insurrection as the rowdy behavior of out-of-town guests, and sucking up to Ginny Thomas, with whom he apparently met with in the weeks following January 6^th.^[3] Standard insurrectionist stuff.

Robinson is antisemitic in all of the predictable ways – the Jewish domination of Hollywood, Jews in secret cabals of international bankers, Jews and their allies in the media. He said that the movie Black Panther was "created by an agnostic Jew and put to film by satanic Marxists," a film that was "only created to pull the shekels out of your Schvartze [Yiddish: Black people] pockets." He joined with Reverend Sean Moon in asserting that the Rothschild Family was one of the "four horsemen of the Apocalypse" and promoted the antisemitic conspiracy theory of a cabal of Jewish “international bankers” that rule every country's central bank, describing Moon’s description as “exactly right.” Finally, he is a Holocaust denier, writing that "this foolishness about Hitler disarming MILLIONS of Jews and then marching them off to concentration camps is a bunch of hogwash," and "There is a REASON the liberal media fills the airwaves with programs about the NAZI and the '6 million Jews' they murdered."^[4]

Candidate Robinson has lately apologized for some of his remarks – the words, that is, not the point of view. He does seem to laud the violent retaliation by the Israelis against Hamas through their genocide of civilians in Gaza. Clearly he prefers Gladiators to victims.

If there’s anyone Robinson hates more than Jews, its LGTBQ+ folks. From a 2021 speech: "There's no reason anybody anywhere in America should be telling any child about transgenderism, homosexuality, any of that filth. And yes I called it filth. And if you don't like that I called it filth, come see me and I'll explain it to you." In the same speech, he called for an end to the separation of church and state in public schools.^[5] In response, an LGBTQ friendly Fayetteville Church – Crossroads Church – recently cancelled an appearance by Robinson, citing “politics.” But never fear; nearby Freedom Christian Academy was glad to welcome him.^[6]

No catalogue of Robinson’s remarks would be complete without his observations regarding women and their right to control their own bodies. Back in 2020, while campaigning for Lt. Governor, he said “For me, there is no compromise on abortion. It makes no difference to me why or how that child ended up in that womb.” He has characterized women who undergo abortions as murderers, even if they are just “24 hours pregnant.” More recently, Candidate Robinson stuck a wet finger into the political winds and decided that not all abortions are unwarranted.^[7] It’s probably just as well – in a 2012 social media post, Robinson acknowledged that in 1989, he paid for a woman that he impregnated to get an abortion. In 2022, Robinson said the woman in question was his eventual wife, Yolanda.^[8]

Don’t think for a second that Black Americans have dodged his bullets. He has regularly greeted MLK day with posts that denigrate the holiday’s namesake: Martin Luther King Jr. was just an “ersatz pastor” and a “communist,” and the 1960s civil rights movement was “crap.” ^[9] John Lewis gets similar treatment, while Barack Obama is said to be "a worthless, anti-American atheist."^[10] On the other hand, Robinson gives White Supremacists a pass: "Note to liberals; I'll accept ‘Gay Pride’ when you accept ‘White Pride.’”^[11]

There’s so much more. His bankruptcies, his mishandling of campaign funds (a 3-year-running investigation), his assaults on Muslims, Mexicans, and other minorities – Robinson is truly the full package. All he’s missing now is a few indictments and he’d be unstoppable.

He may be unstoppable anyway. A shared hatred for truth, justice, and Democracy forges powerful bonds among his people, lurking in the fetid suburban gun shops and prosperity chapels and “Freedom Academies” of this new America.

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^[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Robinson_(American_politician)

^[2] https://www.cnn.com/2023/05/04/politics/kfile-nc-lt-gov-mark-robinson-mocked-school-shooting-survivors/index.html

^[3] https://www.thedailybeast.com/north-carolina-guv-frontrunner-mark-robinson-had-secret-meeting-with-ginni-thomas-after-jan-6

^[4] Ibid., Note 1.

^[5] Ibid.

^[6] https://www.wral.com/video/fayetteville-church-canceled-mark-robinson-event-because-of-his-politics/21234506/

^[7] https://www.cnn.com/2024/01/17/politics/kfile-mark-robinson-abortion-ban-no-exceptions

^[8] Ibid., Note 1.

^[9] https://www.huffpost.com/entry/mark-robinson-martin-luther-king-inferior-communist_n_65a2ee1ee4b0351062f20e92?d_id=7180292&ncid_tag=fcbklnkushpmg00000047&utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Facebook&utm_campaign=us_black_voices

^[10] Ibid., Note 1.

^[11] Ibid.